to all my friends that were there
supporting me throughout my time
holding me up without sensible care
teaching me how to write and rhyme
i should of thought this through
each and every word stanza and line
because i had no clue what to do
or how to write it right in my mind
you set the mold and crimped the end
told me what and how to begin again
but in the end this little godsend
leaves back for a normal life to blend
i never was one to pull stunts like this
but in the end i guess we all must break
it's not like i can ever be truly missed
slithering alone my own path like a snake
eating up the people in my path of road
bending and breaking these rules as i go
each person i touch their insides corrode
laughing as they watch with no care or know
leaving them full of holes and confusion
even tucking the answers in their pocket
but they never end up in a real conclusion,
because i wrote the agenda, the docket.
these papers, like flyers passed around
reaching through the passages of ears
leaving people crying on the ground
feeding on emotions and personal fears
smiling at the hysterical sound
of each and everyone of your tears
no sense of guilt or any sort of remorse
as i let you taste the poisonous drink
vouching, silently starting to endorse
letting you hold the floor as you sink
digging your grave with your own hands
breaking your nails in the dirt and grime
wrapping you in cloth and silky bands
covering your body and eyes making you blind
to the fact, that hate disguised as love
is sent straight from hell down below
but in your mind it is a gift from above
holding this bomb waiting for it to blow
you thought i was sorry, but i was just a liar
time and time again you took my words inside
smiling and telling me thank you in eternal fire
until reality and fantasy finally start to collide
which is when i walk out in the shadows from behind
as your left wondering what happened to my friend
but you could never really love me, one of a kind
as you know the truth now it can finally start to end
--------
and actually comment... something other then ... wow.. or long...What is your honest opinion of this poem?
You write with a big heart. Contrastingly your word choice makes the mood and atmosphere is extremely negative.
What is it you regret? It sounds like you lost your best friend in bitterness, or stupidity. If so, I am sorry to hear it. I'd be surprised if you actually moved on after writing this one without a confrontation, because they obviously mean something to you.
In all ends there is a beginning to a new story, but if you look really closely the new story is the same as the old unless you fix things.What is your honest opinion of this poem?
to be honest boring. I hate poems.
it's preety good. and long. very very long.
Maybe you could make the poem flow better...more connecting words. in other words maybe more rhyming or flowing. Otherwise I really like it. It has meaning. :)
THAT'S AWESOME!!!!
but in the third paragraph, in the end of the second line, i would loose the 'again' after the 'begin'
REALLY GOOD! u should get some publised
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